Can Parents Set Rules for Child's Digital Safety in Custody Orders?

In today’s digital age, children are exposed to the internet and digital devices from an increasingly young age. As a result, digital safety has become a major concern for parents, especially in shared or joint custody situations. Issues like screen time, social media usage, online gaming, and exposure to harmful content are all part of this conversation. Parents may want to include rules about the child’s digital activities in their custody agreement to ensure that both parties are on the same page regarding the child’s online safety. However, the enforceability of these rules and the extent to which courts can intervene in regulating a child's digital life is subject to legal considerations.

Digital Safety Rules in Custody Agreements:

Parental Authority Over Digital Life:

Shared Responsibility:

In joint or shared custody arrangements, both parents typically share responsibility for the child’s digital well-being. This means that they can work together to set rules for online behavior, screen time, and other digital safety concerns.

Enforceable Rules:

Rules regarding a child’s digital activities can be included in a custody agreement if both parents agree. For example, parents may agree to limit the child's screen time, restrict access to social media, or require that online communications be monitored. However, it is important for these rules to be clear and practical so that they are enforceable by both parents.

Types of Digital Safety Rules That Can Be Set:

• Screen Time Limits: Parents can agree to set a daily or weekly limit on screen time, such as no more than two hours of recreational screen time per day or no screen time after a certain hour (e.g., after 8 p.m.).
• Social Media Restrictions: Parents may agree on whether or not the child can use social media platforms like Facebook, Instagram, or TikTok. If allowed, they might impose age restrictions or rules on who the child can interact with online.
• Monitoring and Parental Controls: Parents may install monitoring software or parental control apps on the child’s devices to track usage, block harmful content, and ensure that the child is not engaging in risky online behavior (e.g., talking to strangers, accessing inappropriate websites).
• Cyberbullying Prevention: Given the increasing prevalence of cyberbullying, parents may include provisions to protect the child from online harassment. This might include rules about not sharing personal information, blocking or reporting bullying, and open communication about negative online experiences.
• Online Gaming: If the child engages in online gaming, parents can set rules on what games are acceptable, how much time can be spent on them, and whether or not the child can interact with other players online.

How Family Courts Address Digital Safety:

Court’s Role:

Family courts typically encourage parents to reach agreements on digital safety through communication and cooperation. Courts may be involved if there is a dispute over a child’s internet usage or if one parent believes the other is neglecting the child’s digital safety.

Best Interest of the Child:

Courts always prioritize the child’s best interest, and digital safety is no exception. If one parent is concerned about the child’s online well-being (e.g., exposure to harmful content or cyberbullying), the court may include specific provisions in the custody order to address these concerns.

Enforceability:

While family courts can include digital safety rules in custody orders, enforcing these rules can be challenging, especially when parents have different levels of involvement in managing the child’s digital life. The court may order periodic check-ins or require that both parents document the steps they are taking to protect the child online.

Boundaries and Legal Considerations in Setting Digital Rules:

Child’s Privacy:

There is a balance between protecting the child’s digital safety and respecting their privacy. Parents cannot impose overly restrictive or invasive measures that would violate the child’s reasonable privacy expectations. For example, excessively monitoring private messages or emails may infringe upon the child’s right to privacy.

Technological Realities:

Given the fast pace of technological change, parents may face difficulties in keeping up with new apps, platforms, or devices. Custody orders related to digital safety should be flexible enough to allow adjustments as new technologies emerge.

Parental Disagreements:

Disagreements between parents on digital safety rules can occur, especially if one parent is more lenient about screen time or social media usage than the other. In these situations, mediation or court intervention might be necessary to create a balanced and fair approach to the child’s digital life.

Navigating Disagreements Over Digital Safety Rules:

Mediation:

If parents disagree on digital safety rules, mediation can be an effective way to resolve the conflict. A mediator can help facilitate a conversation about online safety and come up with rules that both parents can agree on, ensuring the child’s well-being is the primary focus.

Family Court Intervention:

If parents are unable to reach an agreement, the court may intervene to issue an order. The court may impose specific restrictions on online behavior if one parent believes the child’s safety is at risk.

Practical Considerations:

Courts tend to favor rules that are easy to implement and monitor. For instance, vague rules like no online activity may not be practical, while clearer guidelines like no social media use until the child is 13 years old can be more enforceable.

Example:

Scenario:

Sara and David share joint custody of their 12-year-old daughter, Ella. Sara is concerned about Ella spending too much time on social media, especially after noticing that Ella has been receiving messages from strangers on Instagram. David, however, believes that Ella should have the freedom to use social media to connect with her friends and expresses frustration with Sara’s restrictions.

Steps Taken:

• Sara and David communicate about the issue and try to reach an agreement on social media usage. They both agree that Ella should have access to social media but only with parental oversight and age-appropriate limitations.
• They decide that Ella’s Instagram account will be monitored by both parents, with rules in place that she can only accept friend requests from people she knows personally.
• They also agree to limit Ella’s screen time to no more than 1 hour per day during the school week and 2 hours on weekends.
• Both parents agree to install a monitoring app on Ella’s phone to track her online activity and ensure she is not accessing inappropriate content.

Outcome:

The parents successfully create a mutually agreeable plan for Ella’s digital safety. If they encounter future disagreements, they can refer back to the court-ordered provisions for guidance.

Conclusion:

Parents in shared custody arrangements can include rules for their child’s digital safety in custody orders, but these rules must be practical, clear, and focused on the child’s best interests. Family courts can enforce these rules, especially if there are concerns about the child’s well-being or safety online. However, parents must balance digital protection with the child’s privacy rights and the realities of modern technology. When disagreements arise, mediation or legal intervention may help create fair and enforceable digital safety rules that both parents can follow.